It's like Bridget Jones' Diary, but with a super-powered vigilante.

June 12, 2005

Shanghai'd

We’re on the ninth hole at Sheffield, and as usual, I am just kicking Mitch’s ass. At this point I can’t tell if I’m a really good golfer, or if it’s just my powers. But really, who cares? Winning is the important thing, especially if you're beating one of your best friends.

“Hey, would you mind babysitting Hector on Thursday for us? Lisa’s got this thing she’s dragging me to.”

I stop before my five-yard putt and look up at Mitch.

“Me? Babysit?” I sound incredulous.

“What, do you have plans?” Mitch asks.

Well, yeah. Fighting crime, keeping the city safe, or catching up on all my Tivo’d Battlestar Galactica episodes. You know, important stuff. Non-baby stuff. Of course, I can’t say that, so I just kind of lamely go: “No…”

“So what’s the problem? It’s just for a few hours.”

“Does Lisa know you’re asking me?” I say.

“Of course.”

“For real? But it’s me.” I say.

“Believe me, you’re not our first choice. I wanted to get that hottie in Lisa’s book club to babysit, but that was a no-go. We’re desperate.”

“Great, thanks,” I say, sourly. “I’m the last on your list.”

“Well, yeah.”

“I don’t know, Mitch. Hector’s like… he’s like a little baby and shit.”

“Connor, he’s not like a little baby, he is a little baby,” Mitch says.

“Whatever.”

“Come on, dude,” he says.

“But I’m totally irresponsible, the last guy you would want taking care of your child.” I don’t mention that I have super-strength and I’m scared to death that I’d accidentally hurt his baby. How do you work that into a conversation?

“No, Lisa’s uncle Nick is the last guy I would want taking care of my child. You’re not even close to the top of the list.”

“I don’t know…” I already know I’m going to do it. Mitch knows it, too.

“Great!” he says. “Thanks Connor. Can you be at our house by six-thirty on Thursday?”

I sigh, and set up for my putt again. “Okay.”

“Attaboy.”

I miss my putt by a good ten feet. Shit.

4 comments:

Verity Kindle said...

The secret to easy babysitting is just three words: baby cough syrup.

LOL I keed, I keed.

tomthedog said...

Hey, VM, have you seen they have the DVD box set of Battlestar Galactica season one at Best Buy? I think it's a Best Buy exclusive; it's the UK version, formatted to play on US DVD players. Also, it comes with a Serenity preview disc. I can't wait to get watching. If it's the UK version, hope it's got more naughty parts than the American version!

Velvet Marauder said...

I am going to have to check that out, except I hate those bastards at Best Buy and am loathe to give them my money. Still, in this case I might have to make an exception. My bitch Chad, who is a Joss Whedon cultist, turned me on to Firefly recently, which I love, so I'm stoked for Serenity.

Lokifan said...

Are you a Buffy fan yet? She's not very you, even though she's hot -- I mean, cheerleader by day, and she's hardly dark or mysterious. But then, there's Angel.
Oops. I drooled on my keyboard. I just shouldn't say the word Angel.
He is also easy to make fun of. In the worst moments, it's like George Clooney as Batman.