It's like Bridget Jones' Diary, but with a super-powered vigilante.

May 30, 2005

Emmanator II: Judgment Day

JC and Wendy have a barbecue on Memorial Day, and Wendy’s cousin Emma Casperson, the hot cop from the ECPD’s Paracrime Unit is there. She looks great, she’s wearing clamdiggers and a tight pink cap-sleeve shirt. By the time she shows up I’ve already had a few beers and JC and I are hanging out on lawn chairs debating what the best war movie is. JC thinks it’s Saving Private Ryan, which is just blasphemy.

“Hey, Emma,” I say, waving her over.

She grabs a beer and saunters over with those hips of hers. “Why it’s Mr. Mackenzie,” she says, smiling mischievously. “Long time no see.”

“What’s the best war movie, Emma?” I ask, as if we never slept together.

“Scoot over,” she says and rests her tight butt down on the end of my lawn chair. “Best war movie, huh?”

I jerk a thumb at JC, who looks interested in how this conversation will play out. This is the first time I’ve seen her since the night we had sex. We haven’t called each other. Wendy informed me that I was a “sport fuck.” My term, not hers. “Maynard here thinks it’s Saving Private Ryan.”

“Please,” Emma says scornfully, taking a chug of her beer. Her neck looks beautiful as she swallows. “What’s your pick?” she asks me.

Patton! Patton rules all.”

“Oooh, that’s a good one. I don’t know, I’m old fashioned so I’m going to have to go with The Longest Day or maybe Zulu.”

JC and I both nod. Acceptable choices.

“Okay, next question,” I say. “We ever going to go out again?”

She laughs. “You and me?”

“Yeah.”

“I wouldn’t get your hopes up,” she says, smiling.

“Cold!” JC says.

I say, “Yeah, what the hell?”

She pats my knee patronizingly. “Don’t misunderstand. I had a good time, and you’re a fun guy, but I’m too involved with my work right now.”

“Busting super-criminals,” I say.

“Right.”

“I heard you guys caught – what was his name? Javelin?”

“Atlatl,” she says.

“That must have been a relief,” I say. I’m feeling bruised, I need to get a shot in to salvage my ego.

“How so?” she says.

“Well, Paracrime hasn’t had much luck catching The Velvet Marauder, have they? I mean, how many chances have you had, but he keeps getting away. That would be frustrating, I imagine, for such a goal-oriented person as yourself.”

JC is smiling, watching this. I bet he wonders if Emma is going to hit me.

Emma stands up, looking a little pissed. Her cheeks redden slightly. “Stick to marketing, Connor. You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Will do,” I say, grinning.

She stalks off.

JC snickers. “You have a unique way of pissing people off, Connor.”

“It’s my super power.”

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I know this is dormant and I haven't finished reading the whole blog. But man, I must say:

YOU ROCK DUDE!!!

You totally put that shorty in her place. Good on you. I will be really upset if this backfires on you; but for now, you strutted your stuff in very fine form.

Well done!

Anonymous said...

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